Grog: The Wrong Legend

The Rusty Cutlass is the least successful pirate ship on six seas. Its most valuable cargo is a crate of slightly damp biscuits. And you are its cook.

You are Greg. You make a chowder that has been described, fondly, as "mostly hot." Then an eager young clerk at the Port Office closes a ten-year-old file, a stamp comes down, and you are now — officially, and against all evidence — the Dread Pirate Blacktide, most wanted legend on the water.

Grog: The Wrong Legend is an interactive comedy where the story is read aloud to you, word by word, and every decision is yours. The crew has mutinied in your favor. Rival pirates keep buying you drinks or trying to stab you. And something the size of a church is following the ship at a polite distance, holding what appears to be an invoice. You cannot sail. You cannot fight. You will have to bluff.

• A hand-authored branching story — your choices decide who believes you, who catches you, and how the legend ends • Full narration over original music and the sounds of the sea — or turn narration off and read at your own pace • 16 endings to discover and collect — 4 ways to pull it off and 12 gloriously wrong ways to go down, each with its own artwork and epitaph to share • Written and narrated in English and Spanish • Plays completely offline; progress and discovered endings sync across your devices via iCloud • No ads, no accounts, no tracking — your story stays on your device

Begin the first act for free. Unlock the complete voyage with a single one-time purchase — no subscription, ever.

How long can a man bluff a legend he cannot even spell?